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How to deal with being taken advantage of?

Forums Love, Sex & Relationships Rape, Sexual & Domestic Violence How to deal with being taken advantage of?

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  • My girlfriend and I had a very unfortunate episode, and I need advice. She lives in an island community, and we’ve been together for three months. Up until recently she was a virgin, while I’ve had sex before.

    When visiting her home, we were invited by a couple in their 40’s for dinner. Since it was some distance to their house, we were offered to sleep over. They proved to be a hippie like couple, living in a big house with a garden. The dinner was pleasant enough, we were wined and dined, while they were asking us a lot of questions about our background and future plans.

    We were given a tour around their property, and the evening we sat in their couch and got drinks. At this point, we’d both gotten quite drunk, but not wasted. Then they started asking sexual questions, and soon found out that my gf was a virgin, and that she’d just started on the pill in preparation to have sex. They started talking about how the first time can be painful for the girl, and the wife suggested that her husband have sex with my girlfriend to make our first time easier.

    At first I thought it was a joke, and thought nothing of it. But after a while they asked if we had thought about their offer. I told them that they should ask her, which they did. They put a lot of pressure on her, telling her how it would be fun, how it would be easier this way, that she shouldn’t be a prude at 18, and finally she agreed. In preparation they start making one of the couches ready, and she went away to pee. At this point I was in a state of shock, and couldn’t bring myself to do anything.

    So my girlfriend got back, and the wife sits down at the end of the couch with me to soothe me. He puts his penis in her mouth, undresses her, and goes down on her. When he starts going on top of her, I ask if they aren’t going to use a condom at least. He tells me straight out that he wants to enjoy the feeling as much as possible.

    The intercourse wasn’t brutal or anything. She comes with a single “ow” when he gets in, and the wife holds me as he moves inside her. He stops several times to ask how she’s doing. After a while he stops to cum inside her.

    There’s only a little blood. The wife gives us drinks to “celebrate.” My girlfriend gets a mirror so she can see the changes down there. The guy claims that the hymen has been pushed aside, but not completely destroyed, and wants another go. When he’s ready, he starts having sex with her again. This time it’s harder, and it takes over an hour before he is done again. It’s over, and my girlfriend gets her clothes on.

    The rest of the night was really awkward. I try to pretend as if nothing’s happened, while the guy keeps telling me how he helped me out and all that. The wife is giggly and makes comments, while my girlfriend tries to keep her dignity by being aloof.

    When we finally go to bed, we have sex together. After what’s being going on, it’s a bit fishy down there, and I’m basically sticking it in another guy’s sloppy seconds. The following morning we are given breakfast, and are thanked for the visit before being taken back. They agree we all should be discrete about the whole thing.

    Now, my girlfriend says she didn’t exactly want this to happen, but she was kind of forced into it in the heat of the moment. Neither of us had the authority or the will to just say no. The results were a humiliating experience for both of us. Her having her private parts violated, and I having to see another guy do that to her.

    It’s obvious this was some kind of sex game for them, and unfortunately we got caught in it. But how should we deal with it? Should we consider this abuse, although we won’t exactly file rape charges or anything, or should we just see this as something that just happened?

    After what’s being going on, it’s a bit fishy down there, and I’m basically sticking it in another guy’s sloppy seconds. The following morning we are given breakfast, and are thanked for the visit before being taken back. They agree we all should be discrete about the whole thing.

    Now, my girlfriend says she didn’t exactly want this to happen, but she was kind of forced into it in the heat of the moment. Neither of us had the authority or the will to just say no. The results were a humiliating experience for both of us. Her having her private parts violated, and I having to see another guy do that to her.

    Hello and welcome to PV

    First thing I’d like to highlight is the crude terminology you used, complaining it was ‘a bit fishy down there / sloppy seconds’ if you didnt like it – you didnt have to go there – it was your CHOICE you could have discussed having a bath together or something – I really dont think it is very respectful to talk about your girlfriend like that,

    2nd – From what you describe – she didnt say no, she chose to do it – intoxicated or not, and she did it twice. how was she forced in to it? there does no sound as if there was any force / drugging or co-ersion, you didnt intervene as I am guessing a boy friend would if he could see his girl friend struggling or uncomfortable ot if she was so intoxicated or not in a position to make decisions

    we ALWAYS have the authority to say no – whether in a relationship with the other person / friends / acquaintances, rape is when we say no and are forced in to sex despite this, or when we do not have the ability to say no as we are drugged, unconscious/ beaten up etc Rape is about violence, not sex

    and if you didnt like watching you could have CHOSEN to leave the room and not watch

    this sounds like something you both choose to do, experiment with and you are now regretting – thats life

    This is one fucked up story if its real

    Agree with what Tank Girl said about the OP’s choice of words for his girlfriend.

    But then I think the whole thing is fishy.

    im just coming off an mxe trip and this story sounds troll like to me, i mean wtf…. this doesnt sound real to me in the state im in lol

    I dont recon its true either, but it fucks me right off when men talk this sort of shit about (their) women, too much for me not to respond!!:crazy::crazy:

    For me the night would have ended around about the time he offered to fuck her.

    I can imagine the type of people these are, they had that shit planned before youd even got there, and used the fact that you guys were young and impressionable and fucked with your head.

    You watched another man fuck your girlfriend willingly? Fuck that.

    this is ‘alestars’ 1 and only post. wouldn’t you at least say ‘hi’ or something first before opening up some proper west sexual story? sorry alestar if you are for real…

    tinternet is weird

    Yeh I saw that too. Probably some 50yo bloke trolling for seedy kicks.

    What a waste of life.

    Wow I think I’ve just found my new, best ever hobby…I’m going to tour the globe and persuade virgin women to allow me to de flower them (with their bfs permission ofc)… It’s a win win for me!

    In all honesty tho m8 ur a complete dumbass…if ur gna let ur girl do this then at least insist that u get to bone the wife!! Don’t just sit there like a pussy doing nothing

    @Voodoomonkey 473479 wrote:

    In all honesty tho m8 ur a complete dumbass…if ur gna let ur girl do this

    Sorry …. but what the fuck??

    Do women not have a voice of their own??

    I know this is prob spam – but your response – *If your gonna let your woman* – what about her choice??

    I wrote earlier if (this is real) I’d imagine a guy would ‘intervene’ if their woman was distressed / struggling ,

    …………………… but no man has the right to choose what a woman decides to do or not !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ………

    There is no way I wouldn’t have left that in the back of a police car and he in a hearse.

    What the actual fuck.

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Forums Love, Sex & Relationships Rape, Sexual & Domestic Violence How to deal with being taken advantage of?