So let me just give you a summary of my life this past year.
Went to Fl for rehab, then met a guy and moved with him. We got married (and are now separated) we started using again and about 8 months ago I became an alcoholic, had detoxed on my own with benzos, and have severe depression, anxiety and panic attacks to this day because of it.
I live on a couch with some people that aren’t great friends, because I have no where else to go.
I got a prescription for ativan and its been helping with my anxiety.
I take it three times a day for about a month now.. and last night I drank.
I’ve read that if you have had alcohol withdrawals in the past and you drink on benzos you will withdrawal again.
I’m scared and lost and confused and tired of thinking I’m going to die at any moment.
I just want to fix myself and I keep messing up.
I just needed to get it out there, and it would be really nice if anyone has any kind words for me.
<3
