NEW WORDS FOR 2006
TESTICULATING. Waving your arms around and talking bollocks.
BLAMESTORMING. Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.
SEAGULL MANAGER. A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.
ASSMOSIS. The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by sucking up to the boss rather than working hard.
SALMON DAY. The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die.
GOING FOR A McSHIT . Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you’re just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member, your declaration to them that you’ll buy their food afterwards is known as a McShit with Lies.
SITCOMs. Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids or start a “home business”.
PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE. The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.
OHNOSECOND. That minuscule fraction of time in which you realise that you’ve just made a BIG mistake ( e.g. you’ve hit ‘reply all’)
AEROPLANE BLONDE. One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a ‘black box’.
AUSSIE KISS . Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.
BEER COAT. The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at 3am.
BEER COMPASS. The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze cruise, even though you’re too drunk to remember where you live, how you got here, and where you’ve come from.
BOBFOC. Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch.
GREYHOUND. A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.
MILLENNIUM DOMES. The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there’s actually nought in there worth seeing.
MONKEY BATH. A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: “Oo!Oo!Oo! Aa!Aa!Aa!”.
SALAD DODGER. An excellent phrase for an overweight person
TART FUEL. Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women
