UK : N : "I got my first spliff in the basement of a mosque.." This chap speaks a lot of sense and its particularly important today; as many well intentioned "tough love" solutions from British Asian familes can drive young men towards the extremists (its no coincidence IS etc have very judgmental views against drugs)
After years of drug and alcohol abuse, 33-year-old Bash Khan now helps rehabilitate others within Lancashire-based Inspire. He says the Asian community still has a long way to go in helping addicts within their community.
“There is a very low percentage of Asians that come in to us.
“As a culture, Asian people live in denial. You can’t solve a problem without acknowledging it first.
“I’d rather be called a recovery advocate, not a champion", said Bash who works for INSPIRE.
'I got my first spliff in the basement of a mosque' (From Asian Image)
Help a brother out So.
Ive been having trouble with my drugs recently and have, in the past 8 months or so, had a couple blackouts and panic attacks as well as some fairly serious heart palpitations and at one point my heartbeat was completely replaced with a flutter. i mean completely.
Had a lot of tests with my GP and after a lot of to-ing and fro-ing he basically came to the conclusion that while he couldnt diagnose me with anything it would appear that i have developed some kind of hypersensitivity to stimulants.
So forgetting all the boring stuff i can do without like red bull, coffee etc that means
No Weed
No Speed
No MDMA (:hopeless:)
No Coke
or anything which might induce a panic attack so
No Shrooms
No Cid
No DMT
No Salvia
at least for another 6-8 months
sooo...
you guys know any fun depressants? :cool:123
My story I lived with my grandparents in Villa Park IL (my parents died when I was very young) and I was a 'goody-goody' - got good grades, wore clothes my grandparents picked out from K-Mart, was unmercifully picked on by students AND teachers alike....didn't drink or smoke or anything. I remember the anti-drug commercials of my childhood, and really believed that if I ever tried drugs, I would either drop dead or jump out of a window.
When I finally moved out in 1995, my grandmother was convinced that I would go bad - I can still hear her telling me,"You'll get on drugs and sell this house!" I called her some very nasty names; basically told her she was deranged. I just wanted my independence - I was 28 and didn't want her freaking out when I came home late (I'd go out to bars with my best friend etc). I left her in the care of a lady from the Catholic Church we used to go to - I had declared myself an Objectivist (the philosophy of Ayn Rand) and refused to attend church.
Not long after I moved to the city (Lincoln Park), I began to become addicted to sex - I actually posted an ad in the 'alternative lifestyles' section of the paper! I met many men and was lured into 'modeling' - which got me into hard-core porn and a promiscuous lifestyle that could've gotten me raped or murdered many times! Eventually I hooked up with an 'interesting' ad, which was a guy who openly called himself a Satanist and a 'recreational drug user'. How adventurous-sounding!
Well, I invited him over.....told him I didn't do drugs and didn't want to, and he said it was ok. After a few weeks he moved in. I had watched him use crack once or twice before, and just thought 'what a strange thing to do!' I had seen the movie 'Rush' and I actually thought life was like that, so I told him please do not let me try it! But after a few weeks that was to change...
Mike, my ex, cried and told me he was afraid that he would cheat on me with a crack whore if I didn’t use with him – and I fell for it! He started off by kissing me and blowing smoke into my mouth, and then I got brave and said I would try a hit. That was it – I got the ‘woo-woo’s’ in my head and I just wanted more and more. When my grandmother passed away, she left me with an inheritance of around $100,000, which I had widely invested in mutual funds; I lived off of the interest and the rental income of what was now my house. I quit my job at Blockbuster – I never had to work again! I began to withdraw money from the bank, and the teller asked (it was a small-town atmosphere in a big city where I lived), and I began to make up lies.
Being a native Texan, Mike couldn’t handle the winters in IL, so I had to walk several blocks to get the car from the parking garage in the snow. After a while, he told me that he wanted us to move to Texas to be near his family and friends. I had no close family, so I agreed. When we moved in January 1997 it was -60 F with snow up to our knees, and when we arrived in TX FOUR DAYS later (his uncle kept having nervous breakdowns; he was also an addict and had just broken up with his girlfriend) it was +60 F! We loved it, Uncle Bruce hated it – he went back to Chicago and we started moving into our new house in East Dallas.
I didn’t work, and eventually I began to request withdrawals from my mutual funds in order to get crack. Twice I went to a Western Union to get ridiculously large sums of cash, with an armed guard at the locked door – one time I even went with my DEALER to get THIRTY THOUSAND dollars! We just kept all of that cash in our closet at home! That year many bad things happened - I almost died from an overdose (I was doing IV drugs by then), and another guy nearly died on our bedroom floor. The money eventually ran out, and we started writing hot checks in several towns. Finally, Mike broke into the neighbors’ house (for the SECOND time) and stole a TV and stereo – the same day they cut the electric off. I ran with him to pawn it, and then went to a ‘friend’s’ house to use in his closet. I remember running stoplights, feeling an insane rush of thrill. Then stark reality hit as he informed us that we couldn’t stay there – we had no place to sleep!
That began a two-week period of ‘living’ in nasty abandoned houses in our area, cheating cab drivers to get to the dope house. I even gave one cabbie my purse! We looked forward to weekends, when we could go to Deep Ellum and make a lot of money panhandling. Mike used me to gain sympathy, as I would walk around with a little teddy bear in my pocket, looking tired and hungry. For some reason, I took to telling people ‘God bless you’ when they gave me change, even though I still called myself an atheist. It just came naturally.
We ran into a guy named Kevin that we used to hang with, and he took us to the ‘best’ places to get crack. He was ‘in charge’ of an abandoned building nearby, and I can remember wanting so much for Mike to ask him to let us stay there. I felt a sense of safety, like somehow everything would be okay. Kevin agreed to it as long as we followed his ‘house rules’ – keeping the place neat and pitching in to buy candles. Gangs would stay there, and the graffiti was chilling to look at; depictions of hanged men on the walls. But I felt safe there, and even stayed behind by myself while the others went to score dope. That was total God protection right there!
We had a nightly cycle of panhandling and walking to the dope house until my feet were so messed up I was limping. Kevin looked after me like a big brother, making sure nobody messed with me and that I ate. We each (there were 4 of us there) had a pallet laid out in this big room, and we used the closet as a bathroom! Once after we returned from panhandling, we discovered the place had been swept and smelled of Pine Sol! And when Mike told Kevin when it was his turn to buy candles that he wasn’t going to, Kevin told him to leave. He did, but returned later that night with the candles and an apology. The reason for his orderliness would become clear later.
In the mornings, I would walk over to McDonald’s, buy a coffee, and sit there with my teddy bear Amelia sticking out of my pocket. People would come by and offer me change and food. Later I even asked for a job application, only to have the manager tell me,”We don’t want your kind around here!”
One weekend we went to Deep Ellum, and I stayed behind in a club’s window ledge to rest my feet while Mike went off to get change. A group from Victory Outreach came over and asked if they could pray for me. For some reason I said they could. Then Mike came back with a hundred or so and off we went. By this time, he was hooked bad on heroin, and most of the money went to his habit, which was good for me, even though I didn’t think so at the time – I gradually detoxed.
The Monday after I got prayed for, we were asleep in the abandoned building. It was February, and we were getting flu symptoms. I had asthma, and I knew that if we didn’t do something soon, we’d die. I had already eluded death by overdose, had a shotgun pointed at my head, been in a holding cell SIX times….I felt my ‘luck’ was running out. But when I tried to tell Mike, he would put his hands over his ears and yell,”I don’t want to hear it!” He was totally out of touch with reality.
Laying on my pallet, I suddenly had a vision of me sitting in an immaculate room, sipping a cappuccino. And then I had the overwhelming urge to get my life back – a life where such a scene would be possible. I now know it was the Holy Ghost. I sat up, thinking that everyone was asleep, stammering,”I….I have to….stop”. I had no clue how that would be possible – you had to go stand in line at the Salvation Army at 8AM, when we were just getting to sleep – and I had no ID, and bus fare meant less dope money! Well, Kevin was awake and he told me,”I am so glad to hear you say that. I know a place you can go.” It turns out that he used to be a room-leader in Reconciliation Outreach, a Christian shelter within walking distance. He had left there to go and use again, but God had still used him to save me!
We walked to McDonald’s for our goodbyes and a cup of coffee – I can remember Steve Perry was playing over the intercom system. Kevin told Mike,”I know you won’t stay there, but don’t you DARE keep her from it!” I was willing to do whatever it took to get a real life back. We walked the blocks to the offices, which were then on Peak Street. Pastor Willie Burnett told us we couldn’t stay because we weren’t legally married, and they had had problems before with splitting up ‘couples’ into the separate men’s and women’s houses. Mike grabbed my hand and tried to pull me out of that chapel, saying,”Cmon, they don’t want us – let’s go get some heroin.” I planted my feet, and Pastor Willie says I slammed my hand on his desk (I honestly don’t remember doing that but I probably did) and shouted,”I’m not going back on the streets – I’LL DIE OUT THERE!” Mike took off – some men tried to get him to go to another mission, but instead he shoplifted an Eckerds and led the cops straight to the place we had been staying! He ended up going to jail for 6 months, and I would have as well if I hadn’t listened and surrendered to God! Then Pastor Willie said to the other workers in the office,”Call Jan at Refuge 2” (the single Women’s house). They knew I wanted to stay.
Well, to make an already too long story short, I stayed there for 17 months, living in a wonderful restored Victorian house with a group of other women who had been addicts, homeless etc. I attended chapel every other night, daily Bible studies, church on Sunday, along with treats such as pool parties and weekend passes. I got a job and eventually moved out to begin my new life. I won’t say I lived clean and sober since then – I have backslid, and I still drink (I am trying to at least slow down). But I was saved by the blood of Jesus Christ shed for me on the cross, and today I have a good life with a wonderful, godly man and two furry ‘daughters’ Yes, beating crack IS possible – but only by letting GOD do it!12…89
Why is it easier for addicts to get pain meds than non-addicts? So, my ex was a herion addict. When ever he couldn't get ahold of any dope, he would go to the doctor or ER and come out with a presciption for oxycontin. I got to the doctor, in real pain, and all I get told is take some freakin tylenol. Tylenol does not help with the pain I'm in at all. I just dont understand how someone who actually needs a stronger pain medicine cant get anything and a known drug addict can.
:crazy:
Going Overboard…… i have always had a bit of an addictive personality and the need for excessive sessioning seems to run pretty strongly in my family,, one time at a festival i took things a bit too far and was on about the third day of a sleepless drug fuelled binge, on the 3rd day id had a g of mandy, 3gs of k, 2 'superpills', a 2cb tablet and a lottt of booze, a couple of times in the night i started to get overwhelmed with anxiety and i started twitch pretty badly and have little spasms in my face, it got to about 6am and i was walking over to a mates campsite to smoke a spliff and have a little wind down and i started to get the anxiety and spasms again then all i can remember is dropping to the ground and i must've blacked out because the next thing i knew i was in lying down in the paramedic tent withmy mate next to me looking at me horrified, apparently i had a seizure,, was this my body just giving up or is there an underlying problem
ALSO, the other day id been on a bit of a sleepless binge again that involved a lot of stimulants, i hadnt slept in 2 days and had had 2 pills, half a g of mandy, a g of coke, a g of mcat and a g of ket, it got to about 3 am on the sunday (id been out since friday) and i pretty foolishly had a hit of some very strong acid and the people i was with were very drunk and irritating, i was starting to get annoyed by them and the fact that my heart was racing so much was alarming me quite a bit, i went downstairs to try and calm down with my other good friend who was on acid so we could just chill out but i was just getting more and more worked up making my heart race faster and i had a bit of a panic attack in the midst of peaking on this acid which was not very pleasant at all, i eventually got about half an hour sleep and then i had calmed down a bit i just talked with my friend for a few hours and things were ok then
are these seizures/panic attacks telling me anything or do i just need to chill out on the binges, sorry for the long post just wanted to talk to people about this i feel as though im getting a bit out of control
HELP! I think I’ve gone and broken my brain First, the basics. I embarked on the journey to hell that is IV meth addiction about 7 months ago, and I typically binge for 4-6 days every 4-6 weeks. By day 3, I'm invariably having visual and auditory disturbances (ie flickers, ripples but not intense or vivid enough to qualify as hallucinations), a severe compulsion to pick at my skin, and all the rest of the tweaker usual suspects.
After my last dose, i sleep and eat and feel sad and guilty for a few hours. It usually takes me 2-3 days to feel clear-headed and capable of intelligent conversation, to no longer feel high or spun out. I spend a few weeks struggling with mild depression and loss of pleasure in things (anhedonia), but aside from the challenges of being a dopaminergically-challenged novelist who is incapable of appreciating beauty, it's become my predictable fiend-binge-recover routine.
Anyway this comedown is markedly different and I'm wondering why. The product was higher quality than usual, if that matters. From early Thursday to early Sunday, I shared about 2.5g with a friend, mostly shooting quarters with a little smoking in between. I remember almost nothing about the binge. It was like I couldn't create new memories while on the stuff. I always get spacey but this was extreme. In fact, I'm still really struggling. I will think about walking the dogs, e.g., and a moment later be unsure whether I already walked them or just thought about walking them.
I have been trying to write this post for many hours and I'm only succeeding now because I'm having some lucidity that I've been lacking for days, up until a few minutes ago. For a couple days I've been psychotic. Vivid hallucinations, paranoia, confusion, emotional flatness, etc. I have no idea what I've been doing. I've gone mad. My last shot of meth was 24 hours prior to this post.
Why might I be psychotic when I do not usually have this reaction? Is it likely to go away when the meth is fully out of my system? If it lingers, might it be permanent? I'm starting to feel confused again, like reality is receding. I'm frightened. I don't want to tell my doctor I've been using but I may need to get medical attention. I don't know.
My brother is dying because of drugs Hi all ,
The details are not important but I want new users to NEVER make stupid mistakes like my brother .....
Simple shit like hydration , not mixing stuff , not drinking alcohol at the same time , not KNOWING IN ADVANCE the mental effects of what u are taking so u have a strategy to deal with the problem .
PARTA , KB .12
My pregnant wife’s alcohol abuse What is the effect of drinking on an unborn child? My wife is a serious alcoholic and refuses to stop despite being 3 month pregnant. And I'm very concerned about the damage she may be doing to our baby. Please help me...
Just Got To Get It Out… I Need Help!!! I have been trying to send this for 12hrs now, I am really struggling to admit that I have lost control of my emotions & had my strength & willpower defeated by the drugs & I am really scared that I am losing my mind... I've lots more to say but for now (just to get this thread posted!) I have to suck it up & admit that for the first time in my life I need help!!!
Im back and shit :D Hi guys, ive been away a while attempting to sort my life out. Wouldnt say it went too badly as ive landed myself a job and recovered from the massive anxiety that was brought on by a rough experience with 25i-nbome (never again.) Just got to kick this 5mg a day valium habit and im golden ;) Anyway it's good to be back and I hope PV hasnt changed too much in the few months ive been away. :)
Heroin Addiction Stories WANTED HEY THERE GUYS AND GIRLS!
As lots of you already know I am currently blogging about my heroin addiction and recovery since starting my blog I have met tonnes of interesting people all in the same situation as me.
I am now looking for heroin addicts/ex heroin addicts to write there addiction story and email it to me and I will post it on my blog for the internet to see.
These stories can be very useful for addicts to see there not alone and parents, carers, family members and friends to see the life of addicts and try and understand the reasons they do the things they do.
So if you have an addiction story please feel free to email me with it or to discuss anything related at jordan.elderkin@yahoo.co.uk.
Check my signature below to see my heroin addiction & recovery blog
addiction come to light appologies if there is already a thread about this --
Iv had a used many drugs quite excessivly for the last 3 years but have developed a real problem with coke,, started gettin withdrawals and my useage went through the roof,,
money became the biggest issue and has soooo many problems over the last 6 monhs and it all came to a head a few days ago and i opened up to my family and a close friend.
we all want to try to fix things, but dont know how, been to docs and going to see where that goes but i was wondering if anyone had any advice or suggestions??
for me or for my mother who i know this is affecting quite dramaticaly.
so yea any advice or even stories of similar situations??
would be much appreciated
t!n x
Please Share: The Craziest Thing that Happened To You Involving Drugs? Hey Guys! I started a Drug Addiction and Recovery Website recently, and I am looking to post (with permission) Crazy and Halarious Drug Stories, anyone got any???
Reply to Post or Email to info@gettingoffdope.com
GettingOffDope.com | A Drug Addiction Recovery Forum
Heroin Addiction and Eating. Hello,
I'm writing a novel which includes a character who is addicted to Heroin and crack cocaine. I have had experience of both, but have never suffered with addiction to heroin, and wondered if anyone here would know about their eating habits.
I know that taking heroin can make you prefer sweet foods over savoury, and many addicts eat junk food rather than nutritious food. Is this because heroin causes them to crave it or simply that often they cannot find time/energy to cook?
Also, how much can they cope with eating? I know it can cause vomiting, and wondered if any foods in particular were easier/harder to keep down?
Any information on experience of eating habits when in the grip of heroin addiction would be helpful. :)
Thank-you12
Drug addiction My name is Rudy romero I just wrote a Poetry book on drug and alochol addiction.You could see some of my poems on my website www.brokenandafflicted.com check it out. I was a addict for 18 yrs of my life.I have been clean and sober for a little over three yrs.I have been through hell and back and you will see in some of my poetry how dark and deep the mind can go under the influence of mind altering substances.Here is a sample of one of my poems.Preminition of death labbelled in sin where do i begain.My heart beats faster who is my master.I am in a mire what is my desire.You still my thunder who am i under.I fall from grace show your face.Im no clone i stand alone.My company is crazy it doesnt even faze me.Do you smell the aroma or is it just a coma.I have no feeling is that what your stealing.This shield that I ware why do you care.Dont push my button i am a glutton.Your power is strong i dont belong.Why are you craving this path that im paving.You will fail my souls not for sale.My energy is power thats why i will devour.You lost your way thats why you will pay. I hope you will visit my site and leave a comment until then godbless and have a good day.
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