I keep messing up So let me just give you a summary of my life this past year.
Went to Fl for rehab, then met a guy and moved with him. We got married (and are now separated) we started using again and about 8 months ago I became an alcoholic, had detoxed on my own with benzos, and have severe depression, anxiety and panic attacks to this day because of it.
I live on a couch with some people that aren't great friends, because I have no where else to go.
I got a prescription for ativan and its been helping with my anxiety.
I take it three times a day for about a month now.. and last night I drank.
I've read that if you have had alcohol withdrawals in the past and you drink on benzos you will withdrawal again.
I'm scared and lost and confused and tired of thinking I'm going to die at any moment.
I just want to fix myself and I keep messing up.
I just needed to get it out there, and it would be really nice if anyone has any kind words for me.
Survey: Client Views on Treatment facilities I am doing a survey for people that have been through treatment and am gathering their personal opinions on the treatment they received. This survey would help me greatly complete a paper that I am doing.
Thank You!
https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/DCXC62D
zopiclone addicten They make hospital easyer and the evening/night possible. 7.5mg once a day for few weeks (originally to help sleep through the pain). Anyone got any experience of giving up?
Is Deeznuts an addict? Quick he seems to finally have gone offline. Ok PVers I'm worried about Deeznuts, I think he's harbouring a secret from us. I think he's addicted to Party Vibe. This boy joined 2 months after me yet is only 100 posts behind me, and if I'm considered a heavy user he's definitely an addict. At this rate he's really compromising his ability to keep up ranks in the search to find MBP. Time for some intervention? What do you guy think?1234
CRAVEN A’s ..HOOKED 4 LIFE…?? Most of it is in the mind when it comes to addiction...I found. It is by no means easy to think positive and be up for becoming clean for yourself. I have done more detox,s in jail than I can recall and when in there you know your not getting any H so you get on with the rattle and it aint so bad.. On street though its different.. If your feeling rough and say three or four days into your detox you can say "forget it" and go score. Prison has a lot To Do with me still being alive and kinda healthy..I classed the spells in jail as breaks to my body. Time to recouperate. MY Drug worker is getting me a gyn pass so I can go train to fill my boring days at home. If I stay home looking at the Mrs all day I will go mad before the years out.lol . I aint useD for a while now and plan to £eave it too some other mug to try.. I have said before I wouldn't wish heroin or any addiction on my worst enemy but having said that, pedofiles need to be od,d with the dtuff on a daily basis...IF you agree let me know...God Bless and be strong..
Lost Right, finally got the motivation and the time to type this little piece up; as a memory of the dark places i've been to and a warning to people, to remind them that no matter how invincible they feel, they aren't.
Basically i've been addicted to mephe for a while now. First started using when we used to all go out together, have a few drinks etc. etc. and a gram would last 4 of us a whole night. Those were the days, where it didn't even matter if we had the drug or not. It was about having a good time rather then taking large amounts of narcotics purely to get shitfaced (Which is what it later turned into..)
Fastward from around June last year, to around June this year and the tale is completely different. No friends at all, the only days i would look forward to is the friday where i would get some just to cain to myself.
Things did get better though, and i met my best pal. Never met someone who understands me, we're pretty much the exact same and just generally get on like two peas in a pod right from the moment we met, he's more like a brother then anything. Anyway, things got real bad again around 3 months ago and i ended up having sessions of just doing 5 grams to myself from around 7pm-11am, some times more sometimes less. Tolerance got really bad and i could take upwards of 400mg bombs with pretty much no effect.
Well last weekend i decided it was to be another session, why not... Ended up stitching up my best mate because i was on a comedown from hell having panic attacks and just generally feeling shit, and i also owed another friend money too but hadn't paid her back despite being able too. Meph was more important. Now lost the few friends i did have, and i haven't even spoken to my best friend since. That comedown was the worst and i had intense panic attacks and depression, was about 10 seconds from jumping off a bridge into four lanes of traffic but fortunately my old dear rang me, god i love that woman. Just been bunking off college and smoking weed all week because what else is there to do?
Finally decided im going to stop wallowing in self pity and fucking crack on. I don't know how it's going to go, having smoked weed for 4 years and only going out when on drugs for the past 2 or so its a pretty scary prospect to go drug free however silly that sounds.. Can't even listen to trance tunes etc. anymore because the cravings get so bad that i get mini ghost rushes that are like smaller versions of meph rushes. Shit is like a parasite.
Gotta get rid of these problems one by one..
Ahh i also almost forgot about the poor memory its left me with, i used to have almost photographic memory and now i struggle to remember what i did yesterday (Okay, obviously only somethings but still.) Sometimes i'll be in the middle of doing something and forget and its so frustrating! although this doesnt happen a lot. I also have crippling social anxiety, i feel like my body is shaking/twitching constantly when around people and get so self conscious. Also feel that i walk funny and so become hyper-aware of it and this is horrible too. Possible depression aswell, but i'm convinced(hoping anyway) that this is just down to dopamine disregulation and will all eventually subside.
The only light at the end of the tunnel for me right now is my weightlifting and hardcore exercising which i've got into, and my law work..
I only physically wanted to stop when i looked at myself in the mirror and said "You're not a liar a cheat and a thief (Stolen money from family before, fucking disgusting.)" and broke down crying.
This stuff has warped me badly, this is nothing like who i was/who i want to be.
Anyway don't know why i decided to type all this up but i'm glad i did, even though its not in any order whatsoever and probably makes little sense. sending you all good vibes and respect, one love :group_hug123
AA Meetings and Sober houses Chemical dependency (drug addiction and alcoholism) may appear to be a dangerous habit but it is just one of the ways that person uses to cope up with an underlying problem which is more serious than a mere habit.
The best treatment for chemical dependency starts with a detox program to remove the symptoms, followed by dealing with the underlying causes of addiction. Unless these issues are addressed, these core issues shall continue to harm a person, trigger relapse and the whole process of addiction shall never end. These underlying issues can be addressed through a good treatment approach that addresses the physical and psychological symptoms of addiction.
A person should also learn basic life skills to positively cope with things that trigger relapse. Sober houses, halfway houses and good treatment facilities have sound and established methods of dealing with different types of addiction. Enrolling in these facilities will facilitate focused and effective treatment.
Pinned
messed up hello people, this is my first post on a drugs forum, allthough i have been a herion addict for 20 years. i have successfully completed a methadone rip (several times) this is the first time thaat i have not had a saftey net of meth or subutex/suboxone to fall back on. i am a single dad to my little8 year old girl who in reality has saved my life. i am a full time student studying criminology and hope to do my masters in sociology, i am a marxist and politically motivated, however i just cant shake this monkey off my back, for the past month i have been hitting up spag bols, smack and crack in the same pin. im so scared of telling anyone in case they take my liyytle girl away from me as she is my world as i am hers. i just cant believe the posistion that i have put me and my faughter in and now i cant see a way out. any advice would be really appreciated
2 redbulls, 5 cans diet coke, 6 cups of joe, 1 big cup of addiction Ok so you don't have to tell me...I know this is a stupid thread but I don't know if I should be concerned.....My daily intake consists of on average 2 12 oz. red bulls, 6 cans of diet coke, and 6 cups of coffee, sometimes even 3 redbulls, my heart races alot and I feel jittery, that's why I suffer from lack of sleep..but Im addicted and I can't stop! Is this consumption normal? Can you OD on caffeine?12
Ibogaine drug addiction ‘treatment’ Has anyone every heard of or known anyone to be cured from drug addiction with ibogaine? Ive heard a couple of stories recently and have thought about giing it a whirl. But all the info i an find on is for opiate and alcohol addicition an im not sure if it would work with Ket. Or work at all for that matter...
Macaulay Culkin shocker I knew he was doing drugs, but I didn't know he was a DJ
Mod Edit: This post was removed in compliance with a DMCA take down request.12
Warning NARCANON is Scientollogy I don't know how much you guys know about NARCANON but recently 4 people have died in the "rehab" centres. They are not medically trained proffesoinals. They have a policy of taking ALL of your perscibed drugs away from you at the door (including epilepsy pills) The treatment consists of saunas, vitamins and touch assists (healing hands There is allot of protests going on in the US. I urge you to watch these attached videos to get an idea of whats going on as I i'm not the best person to try to explain it. Here's the experts;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBHZ6q47qhM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPpH3lLPDMA&feature=plcp
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