Classic Prank Calls! All classic must hear prank calls!!
THE WEED MAN
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The Weed Man Prank Call
YOU KICKED MA DOG!!
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You Kicked My Dog Prank Call
STOLEN NEWSPAPER
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Stolen Newspaper Prank Call
The Hilarity of Harry Potter Quotes when Changing "Wand" to "Willy" "Panting, Harry fell forwards over the hydrangea bush, straightened up and stared around. There were several faces peering through various nearby windows. Harry stuffed his willy hastily back into his jeans and tried to look innocent."
A magic willy... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.
"Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first willy. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice willy for charm work."
"Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany willy. Eleven inches. "
"... Today's will be a practical lesson. You will only need your willies."
"Don't put your willy there, boy!" roared Moody."
"Both Sirius and Snape lowered their willies... the unexpected entrance of so many witnesses seemed to have brought them to their senses... "But what's going on?" asked Mr. Weasley. "Nothing, Arthur," said Sirius, who was breathing heavily as though he had just run ...a long distance."
"Well, we'll soon find out, won't we?" said Snape smoothly. "Willy out, Potter."
Draco whipped out his willy, but Harry was prepared and his willy was in his hand before draco could react....
"He and all the other Weasleys froze on the threshold, gazing at the scene in front of them, which was also suspended in mid-action, both Sirius and Snape looking toward the door with their willies pointing into each other's faces and Harry immobile between them..."
"Snape lay panting on the ground. James and Sirius advanced on him, willies raised..."
"Are you OK?" said Harry urgently.
"My willy," said Ron. "Look at my willy."
It had snapped, almost in two; the tip was dangling limply, held on only by a few splinters
"Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's willy, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"
"Come on Harry, whack your willy out." said Hermoine.
The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's willy had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.
"Lupin drew his willy so fast that Harry had barely the chance to reach for his own"
"It's time you learned the difference between life and dreams Potter," said Malfoy. "Now give me the prophecy, or we start using willies." "Go, on then," said Harry, raising his own willy to chest height. As he did so, the five willies of Ron, Hermione, Neville, Ginny and Luna rose to either side of him.
He bent down and pulled his willy out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.
But a reckless rage had come over Harry. He kicked his trunk open, pulled out his willy, and pointed it at Uncle Vernon.
He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his willy, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his willy at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.
"Running to Daddy now, are you? Is his ickle boxing champ frightened of nasty Harry's willy?"
"Your authority!" she sneered, attempting to wrench her hand from his grasp. "You lost your authority when you lost your willy, Lucious!"
"Neville, I'm really, really sorry about this." said Hermione, raising her willy.
"Yes," Harry said, gripping his willy very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his willy.
"Then he whirled his willy at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them."
Then, with a sigh, he raised his willy and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.
"Yes, very handsome. And is it working well? I always think willies require a little breaking in, don't you?"
'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised willy.
Harry hurried along it, stumbling now and then on the uneven floor, holding his willy out in front of him.
"There will be no foolish willy-waving or silly incantations in this class!"
"What's got your willy in a knot?"
"Just because you can use magic now does not mean you have to whip your willies out for everything!"
"No," said Voldemort. "I have peformed my usual magic. I am extraordinary. But this willy... no. It has not revealed the wonders it has promised. I feel no difference between this willy and the willy I procured from ollivander all those years ago."
"...did things with a willy I've never seen before..."
"But if my willy was so powerful, how come Hermione was able to break it?"
Harry took the willy. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the willy above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls.
"Harry looked down at his own Willy. He could see finger marks all over it..."
"Stand back." said Lockhart, who was rolling up his jade-green sleeves. "No-don't-" said Harry weakly, but Lockhart was twirling his willy and a second later had directed it harry's at arm.
He looked down at his willy, which he was still clutching in his hand.
"Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry. "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me willy in half an' everything."
"Don't put away your willy, Harry. They might come back."
The hilarity of Harry Potter quotes when changing "wand" to "willy"
UK : NW : Gilberts Fridge fair play to whoever uploaded it! this is what my generation grew up with - probably explains a lot :laugh_at:
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Olivia Lee: Dirty Sexy Funny [YT]rX2aWfm0hlI[/YT]
Anyone see her show? I watched it for the first time today and thought it was pretty funny.
Also she would get it so it's a win win really. raaa
DE : German clubber busted after snorting line off undercover cop car! FAIL
BERLIN (Reuters) - German police detained a nightclub reveler they caught trying to snort amphetamines off the top of their unmarked patrol car.
The 26-year-old began lining up the powdered drugs on the roof of the car in a disco car park, when the two police officers surprised him, a Nuremberg police spokesman said on Tuesday.
The man had no idea the normal looking vehicle belonged to the police, and it was coincidence that the officers -- who were walking by their parked car -- discovered him just as he was about to take the drugs.
"He's got horrible luck," said Bert Rauenbusch, police spokesman in the southern German city.
(Reporting by Christopher Lawton, editing by Paul Casciato)
Police catch man snorting drugs on their car | Reuters
Annoying people who dont understand you can like heavy metal AND D&B, house, IDM etc. right, another silly/pointless/irrelivent tread from yours truely...
RIGHTY-O then, i have been into heavy metal since i was about 11 years old, i went through the standard progression, pop punk-nu metal-hardcore-speed metal-death metal....and now i am in a lovely little world of the heaviest metal around...
BLACK METAL and grindcore...
now my 'rant' if you will is based on the rather crued and snide remarks i have recevied over the many years about my taste in music. Although i do regularly have days were i'm goin completely bonkers and jumpin around falling over everything listening to heavy metal, within a split second i could be listening to elvis presley or the four tops.
Now some of my friends understand just how eclectic i am, and there used to my obtuse ramblings...
There was one person who try as i might, i could not get them to understand my music taste, the music on my phone goes from bands such as:
*anaal nathrakh-british blackened grindcore-possibley THE heaviest band out of britain ever...and two of the nicest blokes...
*(dont mock me) take that-only one song though, patience (because its a good tune and reminds me of yester year)
*Kanio-minimal techno genius
*Verra Cruz- christian rock band who really do rock out hard
*(this is lame i know) dolly parton...
then theres a irrelivent mix of dark D&B, dirty house, tons of IDM and some rather strange band from japan called mad capsules market who are proper odd, brutle but odd
But yeah, back to the point i'm attempting to make, a while ago a friend asked me what i was letening to, so i said "have a listen". bareing in mind he knows me as Gary the psycho metaller, and to his shock i was listening to ceephax acid crew.
to say his face was a picture of shock/disgust is an understatment...
he couldn't figure out that, yes, i loooove heavy metal, but that is not the only music in my life. yeah, wake up in the morning seek & destroy by metallica is a good wake up, but in his mind its all i listen to. trying to explain that i listen to music that suits my state of mind was like running a mile on your hands...
he didn't get it, so after about 1 hour of explenation in thee most laimens way i could. i finally got it...
YOU CAN TAKE THE BOY OUTTA THE METAL,
BUT YOU CAN'T TAKE THE METAL OUTTA THE BOY
it annoys me to think that some people are soo closed minded about music, i listen to everything from ambient to wobble house... exept rap. raps poo
So, i've said what i wanna say, haha, i say what i like and i like what i say!
thanks for spending the time reading me moan about my life...
TA TA!
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