Bad Joke Thread

[1 Iliesse @iliesse Participant Subscriber]

@Angel 571905 wrote:

Chatting about rights and wrongs about relegion and politic does not belong in this thread!

ANGEL i love when you talk like a teatcher from 1850
So i try to put one joke, ohoh :

two moslems friends are taking the plane for the FIRST TIME. After some hours, one is standing up and goes to the toillets.
Few minutes later the planes hostesses are bringing the dinner.
The friend, still sitting alone, very hungry eat his meal. After a while, seing his friends not coming back, he take his friend meal and enjoy the second meal.
5 minutes later the moslem friend comes back from the toilets, sitting down, he remarks that his meal isn’t there anymore.
Asking his friend “what happend to my meal?”
He replies, “Am sorry, i didn’t see you comming back and thought you decided to go home!!!”

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

Good effort iliesse. You have some patience with your translator.

[1 Iliesse @iliesse Participant Subscriber]

it’s good, i mist go out , so am not going to see you all jocking abiut my bad english, and next time i put it it in german or french, dee you all later, you to mr teatcher ANGEL (LOL)

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

Your English is far better than my knowledge of your language, or any other language so I can’t mock you for that.

[6 Angel @angel Moderator Staff]

@iliesse 571942 wrote:

it’s good, i mist go out , so am not going to see you all jocking abiut my bad english, and next time i put it it in german or french, dee you all later, you to mr teatcher ANGEL (LOL)

Bad bad student :p

Put it in German and I’ll translate 😉

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

Robbie Williams broadcasting his wife’s labour. I can see why, it’ll probably be the only time when he can prove he isn’t the biggest cunt in the room.

My wife asked me to knock something up in the kitchen…

The cleaner is now pregnant.

[6 Angel @angel Moderator Staff]

@Tryptameanie 572022 wrote:

Robbie Williams broadcasting his wife’s labour. I can see why, it’ll probably be the only time when he can prove he isn’t the biggest cunt in the room.

He’s lovely <3

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

I was lying next to my new girlfriend and I said, “You’re different to all the other girls I’ve slept with.”

She said, “That’s because I’m a bloke, you twat.”

That’s what I love about Martin… She’s got a great sense of humour.

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

I was going to tell a great Ebola joke but if you’re not black you probably won’t get it.

[6 Angel @angel Moderator Staff]

ouch

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

Tomorrow, I’m going to open up the time capsule I made when I was a kid.

I can’t wait to see how big my puppy is.

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

When my partner asked me to name all my sexual partners I’d ever had, I had to think back to when I was 16.
I took a couple of minutes to list them off and eventually got to my current girlfriend.
Looking back, that’s where I should have stopped.

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet.

I shouted up to him, “What’s up Abdul, won’t it fucking start?”

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

Why doesn’t Viagra work on chavs?

‘Cos they only get hard when they’ve got ten mates behind them.

[1 tryptameanie @tryptameanie Participant]

Tim Cook, CEO of Apple has come out as gay.

Explains why his phones are bent.

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