Hans de Ruyter, head engineer of PTT Telecom Cigarettestan Radiocommunications Division once lived in Groningen, Netherlands where he worked for Agentschap Telecom until one cold winter he was assigned to track down a pirate transmitter and this occured…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_M53keMvCGo
after a fruitless search for his lost toupée he decided to trudge back to his peilauto; where he encountered a young lad on a bicycle who introduced himself as Ahmed; offered Hans a cigar (which he gratefully accepted) and said “in our country you we need chaps like you, and weather is far better, our bears are friendlier than others in the region and there are less snik (snake) and not any tiger or lepoard other than at zoo”. (these animals sometimes menace telecoms engineers working on remote sites in Asian nations)
Hans was himself a music lover and never enjoyed shutting down the pirates anyway (and could also take his early retirement in Europe).
He was soon on the next KLM flight to Kuala Lumpur, where he got the boat to the Peoples Republic of Cigarettestan – not the most luxurious vessel (as it also transports halibut from Japan to the Phillipines; the cabin crew do considerately provide clothes pegs for passengers to put on their noses).
Unlike many other nations today not only does Cigarettestan welcome visitors and immigrants they get an official royal welcoming ceremony from His Majesty King Ahmed Nosmo (natives and foreigners of all ancestry and religion joyfully take part in as a national holiday is declared so it is an excuse for a big party)
although there is no complicated citizenship test; it is customary for immigrants to tell a story and/or sing a folk song about what made them decide to travel to the country – Hans performed this in both his native Gronings dialect and English; wearing lederhosen and a traditional Asian conical hat (or the sun would be too hot upon his head). As Band II broadcast licensing is much more liberal in CT he doesn’t need to worry about extra ventilator fans depriving him once more of his headgear (they are often added to TX equipment but are just to stop overheating due to the tropical weather).
His song is regularly used to test the SMS message network…
@tryptameanie 981722 wrote:
Am lost……
TBH the whole saga goes back about 4 years; I accidentally deployed a insecure CMS on another VPS which is now used for my blog; within seconds it was full with spam comments originating from China and SE Asia. These even included an ad for multi species diet pills “suitable for human, dog and cat”.
so after reimaging the server being of SE Asian ancestry myself I decided to “hack” it myself before anyone else did and the proper content was added – to avoid being pulled up for racism against any known community (the VPS is hosted in DE where I could get trouble)
I thus created an entire island nation in SE Asia (other posts about it are someone on here) and a blog similar to the one North Korea set up – although compared with neighbouring countries it is a very tolerant régime (the only SE Asian nation you can get stoned and caned in where it won’t hurt!) that is run as socialist peoples republic but has a monarch (His Majesty King Ahmed Nosmo, originally from Cleethorpes)
The stories and characters are based on genuine aspects of SE Asian culture (what actually goes on as opposed to the media spin) including stuff my uncles got up to during the 1970s :laugh_at:
the telephone numbers and ITU radio callsign allocations are also compliant to the international standards – I use this data for testing systems so it cannot be confused with any actual live systems..
