Yeh, Heroin is a big NO NO NO.
As is any serious opiate habit (like those oxy sniffers, same deal). I went on Methadone for 2 or 3 years. That was hell and I used on top plus smoking crack just to get high while abusing countless benzos and alcohol on top aswell. Yeh, I OD’ed a few times. Luckily I survived.
Strong opiate addiction is hell. It’s a slow (or sometimes quick) death. It destroys your personality. It ruins friendships. It turns you into a hermit. Your whole life falls apart. And, my goodness, it is so hard to get back from it.
I eventually went on subutex and I know that has saved some peoples lives but I also hated that stuff too. It’s extremely strong and very addictive. I went through hell withdrawing off the stuff. Not as extreme as short acting opiate withdrawals but heck, it just goes on forever so I don’t know which is worse.
Subutex leads people to believe they are clean and sorted. They still forget that it is massively effecting their personality and ability to feel emotion and relate to other people. It fucked me like any other opiate.
I been clean 9 months now. Still trying to get my life back together. Still struggling with breaking the hermit lifestyle cycle. Still just don’t know how to function as a full human being without the opiates coursing through my veins. But, I wasn’t functioning on them anyway. I was a total and utter mess. I lost all friends, all respect, all confidence, all morals. I was an asshole, a dope fiend. I hated myself so much I didn’t care about OD’ing in the end. In fact, I went to bed at night hoping I’d never wake up.
Yeh, Heroin (and similar powerful opiates) are NOT clever. Don’t be fooled by a little selfish, self-absorbed ‘bliss’. It won’t last long until it just becomes a matter of trying not to feel sick all the time. And yeh, you feel sick on it too. I felt ill most of the time after a while. I never got high any more. Just sick all the time, nauseous, constipation from hell, health problems, mental health problems, behavioural problems. It was the worst mistake in my life and I’m still paying for it.
Who’s going to employ a 36yo ex-registered addict? Man, why, why, why?
Don’t make the same mistake. It’s an evil drug. Many drugs have side-effects and shit parts but yes, heroin/opiates are in a total different category to everything else, even cocaine. Crack is pretty evil in my opinion but still, I detoxed off that in 3 days although cravings lasted for a very long time. Going harder than cocaine is bad news and cocaine certainly isn’t handled well by some.
STAY OFF HEROIN, PERCOCETS, OXYS, STRONG OPIATES. Try not to get used to the weak opiates either although I know they are hugely less problematic but my opiate love affair started 18 years ago after taking a very large dose of codeine. I chased the poppy products for the rest of my life till early last year.
It ruined my life also. I just hope I can rebuild it somehow…
